Last Call for 2019: Fiat 500X is a truly fabulous gay car!
Show your heirs (or in some cases, errors) how proud you are of them by getting them something that really says PRIDE: the 2019 Fiat 500X.
Jennifer Lopez first brought this car to the forefront as just the ‘500’ over a zillion years ago when it was just a two-door here in the United States colonies, and it became an instant gay fave. It was small, swift and sporty – and it came in a variety of festive colors that often you only see during the patriarchally-approved holidays, if then.
(One of my favorite signs in New York this past summer at the 50th Anniversary of Stonewall read: “My Life is Your Vacation”. Ain’t that the truth!)
This little car has matured a lot over the years and is technically an SUV, but it really is a small gay car with all the fabulousness you need to be all you can be and park it wherever you can under any circumstances. Assuming friends and acquaintances don’t over-accessorize, you can get four reasonably-sized adults in the car and roll away for a smashing good time. Just think of all the fun your heirs will have without you. And if you are also paying the petrol bill, this baby gets a combined 26 miles per gallon.
If you can still find any on the lots or from your dealers (however defined), the 2109 Fiat 500X starts at $24,740 for the ‘Pop’ base trim (how gay is that?). There are two more trims, Trekking and Trekking Plus, and all trims now have All-Wheel Drive, which will come in handy in case junior decides to go for a drive in December and gets lost someplace where he can easily access your credit card. Standard across the lineup is a turbocharged 1.3-liter engine.
And as always, all trims contain a very upscale interior that makes every ride feel like you are sitting in one big bubble bath with all your friends. Still, you must bring your own squeaky toys.
To be sure, this is a gay party-mobile. You can hop in, crank up the Lady Gaga, make some noise and let the gayness explode everywhere. The Fiat 500X is meant for your lifestyle – and that means its fabulous because, well, you are fabulous. Or, to be sure, your heirs or dependents or whomever are fabulous. However you want to play it, honey. You just get in and drive, girl.
Admittedly, the Fiat 500X has had a few growing pains from its youth almost a dozen years ago, but that may be because other younger, bouncier competitors have come on the scene to steal the gay thunder. Sure, as we LGBTQs have aged, it is harder for us to get in and out of the backseats of those cute little cars. And what used to seem like an ocean of cargo space may now seem a bit cramped. As always when buying a car or acquiring a future in-law, open every door and check every space to make sure it’s to your liking.
Nonetheless, few cars say ‘pride’ like the Fiat 500X. Sure, anymore, that may not be enough to open your wallet, but you should check it out and see if it will work for you – or the daughter or son or child or loved one whoever needs a reliable car that will help them get through college or whatever they may be going through, to include an impeachment process!
I mean, you don’t want to spoil them…….
Happy New Year. All the Best for 2020 from Queer Forty!
